What if I forget her?
by Crazyyellow
Summary: 'I hate you.' 'You don't, Eli, please don't say anything that you don't mean.' 'Oh, I do mean it. I hate you' 'Please, stop-...' 'I HATE YOU, CLARE' - my first fanfiction ever, please leave me a review. Rated K because I have no idea what this is supposed to be rated. Also, please let me know if I should continue this story or stop immediately.
1. Chapter 1

**So, yeah. This is my first fanfiction ever. I started with writing fanfictions... three days ago, or something. So, I'm not the best, just so you know. I can't write _really_ long chapters yet, but I will be able to soon. I just need to practice a bit, I think. Please leave me your review! Please tell me what you think about the way I write, and of course, the story. Especially tell me what you think about the story, I'm really curious about it. I know it's not much yet. But do you think that it's dramatic? Exciting? Even hilarious? Please tell me. I can take critique, so please don't be afraid that you would 'hurt my feeling' or something, haha. I'd love to get critique actually! Kaykay, this was it, actually... I don't know what to say else. Please enjoy my story, and don't forget to review! **

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_''I hate you.''_

_''You don't, Eli, please don't say anything that you don't mean.''_

_''Oh, I do mean it. I hate you!''_

_''Please, stop-...''_

_''I HATE YOU, CLARE!''_

I woke up, sat up and grabbed my head. It hurt. I looked outside, it was night and full moon. The moon was the only light that came in my room. I sighed and lay back again. _Three days ago, Clare and I got into a fight. After that fight, she disappeared. Nobody knows where she is..._ I closed my eyes, but all I could see was Clare's face, so I immediately opened them again. ''Clare,'' I mumbled, ''I'm sorry, please come back.'' After some time, I finally fell asleep.

_''Clare? Clare, where are you?'' I said, while running through the streets. I was out of breath, and scared. ''I'm over here,'' I heard a voice saying. The voice sounded a lot like Clare's. ''Where?'' I yelled. ''Please don't yell...'' said the voice. ''I'm sorry, Clare, where are you? Please, let me know,'' I said, and I felt some tears rolling down my cheek. ''Clare, I miss you! I'm sorry for everything. I don't hate you, I really don't, you know that! Clare, please come back!''_

Again I woke up, but this time it was morning. _Four days without my angel already._ I felt tears rolling down my cheek. Apparently, I cried for real instead of only in my dream. I wiped the tears away and stood up. I made myself ready for school, and left the house when I was done.

I arrived at school and studied the building before I went inside. I sighed and walked to my locker. I opened it and noticed that we were still sharing the same locker. All of Clare's stuff were in my locker... I couldn't possibly throw her stuff away, no matter how bad I wanted to. I gasped and smashed my locker close with a lot of noise. I leaned against it with my back and slided down until I sat on the floor. I covered my head in my arms. ''Eli,'' I heard a voice. I looked up and looked at Jake. ''Still no signs of Clare?'' I asked. He shook his head. ''Are you sure that you don't know what happened?'' he asked, and I turned away my head. I shook it and Jake nodded. Then he walked away. I sighed and grabbed my head. _Please, Clare..._


	2. Chapter 2

**I am not happy with this chapter, I can't explain why. Anyway, thank you for following my story and for the reviews! It means a lot. (-^^-)**

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_This is the second time I lost someone I really love, because of a fight._ I was looking out of the window and let out a sigh, again. It really drove me crazy that I didn't know where Clare was, and that I was the one to blame. _I snapped at her while she did nothing. I had a fight with my dad and I became angry. Clare only tried to help me. I'm such a selfish person... _I startled a bit when I heard the bell ring. I stood up and kept looking out of the window. My next subject was English, and I didn't want to go, since it was _our_ subject. I wanted to skip, but there was no way I could. With a lot of reluctance, I made my way through the hallway to the classroom.

''Eli,'' I looked up from my work and noticed that Ms Dawes was signing me to come to her. I looked around and stood up. I walked up to Ms Dawes and just looked at her. It was quiet for a moment. ''Yeah?'' I eventually asked. Ms Dawes looked around, and then at me. ''Clare Edwards is absent, right?'' she asked. I gulped and nodded. ''I still had an assignment from her, and she really needs it back,'' she said while taking out an assignment and holding it in my way, ''would you mind giving it to her for me?'' I wanted to say no, but I automatically took it and nodded. I smiled a bit and then I walked back to my seat. I started to look out of the window and noticed that it started to rain. I couldn't help but to worry about Clare getting sick, since I had no idea where she was. She could be somewhere safe, or not, inside or somewhere outside, getting a cold right now. I let out a sigh and continued my work.

School was finally over. It was still crowded in the hallway because it was pouring. Now and then some people went outside, running to the car that came to pick them up. I started to walk around, searching for someone. When I finally found her, I ran towards her. ''Alli!'' I yelled, and she turned around with a confused face. ''Uh, can I help you?'' she asked. Alli and I weren't on the best terms at the moment, but I needed her to find Clare, since they were best friends. ''Have you, uh,'' I started, ''talked to Clare lately?'' It was quiet for a bit, but then she shook her head. ''No,'' she said, and she got a worried look on her face, ''why?'' I gulped and looked around. ''She, uh, is missing since-...'' ''What? She's missing?'' Alli interrupted me, ''why didn't anybody tell me sooner? What happened?'' Alli was panicking and I considered to hold her shoulder to calm her down, but if I would, I knew she would kill me. ''Friday night, she just... disappeared,'' I said, ''nobody knows what happened, or where she is right now.'' Alli shook her head and grabbed her cellphone. She held it next to her ear and signed that I should be quiet. I just looked at her. She put the phone down again and had a worried look her face. ''She's not answering,'' she said. _Well, what would you expect?_ I sighed. ''If you hear anything from Clare, please tell me,'' she said, and smiled a bit at me, ''I will tell you too.'' I nodded and then she walked away.

It wasn't raining anymore, and a lot of people were already gone. There were only a few people still left in the school, including me. I was in the media room, checking all of Clare's social accounts. She hadn't been online on any of them since that friday, before our fight. I closed my eyes and shook my head. I immediately opened my eyes again and shut down the computer. I stood up and walked back to my locker. I opened my eyes and stood there for a few minutes, staring at something in my locker. I carefully took it. It was a necklace that I gave to Clare when we were two months together. It was a pretty, gold heart with a very small text on it: 'This heart belongs to Eli. Forever and Always.' It was unique, it was specially made for me to give to Clare. I can remember that she had it on her neck when we had that fight... _Why was it here, in my locker?_


	3. Chapter 3

**I have to be honest, I really like this chapter. While writing, I just felt it in my stomach. I'm weird, heheh... But I hope you guys like it, or, well... think it's good.**

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_I walked up to her house and knocked on the door. Clare opened it and smiled at me. ''Hello there, stranger,'' she said while she was smiling, she stepped aside and opened the door a bit wider, ''come in.'' I smiled at her and walked inside. She closed the door behind me and I looked around. It was quiet, there was no one else besides us. I turned around and looked at her. We were just staring in each other's eyes for a few minutes. She came closer to me and put her arms around my neck. ''How are we going to celebrate that we're two months together?'' she asked. I shrugged and leaned in for a kiss. She kissed me back and after a bit, we both pulled back. We smiled at each other and then I put my hand in my pocket. ''What are you-...'' she asked. She got interrupted by a little bag I took out of my pocket. ''For you,'' I said, while I held the bag in her direction. I smiled and she smiled back, confused. She opened it and carefully got a necklace out of it. She studied it with big eyes. ''Eli, it's... it's beautiful,'' she said and then she gave me a hug. She backed off again and looked at the necklace again. ''This heart belongs to Eli...'' she started to read what it said on the necklace, ''...forever and always.'' She looked at me again and smiled, I smiled back and took the necklace from her. I put it on her neck and then she kissed me again. Right after, we decided to go watch a movie._

_It was 10 pm when the movie ended. I petted the head of my girlfriend that was resting on my shoulder. I smiled and pressed a little kiss on her forehead. She looked at me and smiled. ''I'm sorry,'' I said and she came up, ''I really need to go.'' We both stood up at the same time. ''Alright,'' Clare started and gave me a kiss on my cheek, ''I had fun tonight,'' she touched the little heart that she newly had around her neck, ''and thanks, again. I really love it.'' I smiled and we both walked to the door. ''Anything for my girl,'' I said. I could see a small blush on her face and then I walked out the door. I walked to my car and looked back at Clare. We smiled and she closed the door. Then I got in my car and started to drive home, where I probably had a problem._

_I parked my car in front of my house and gulped. I walked up to the door and tried to be as quiet as possible. I opened it and the house was dark, except for the living room. I closed the door behind me and the lights got turned on in the hallway. ''Elijah,'' I saw my father standing in the door opening from the living room, ''do you know what time it is?'' I looked at my phone. ''Oh, well, lost track of time, I guess,'' I said and wanted to walk upstairs, but my dad stopped me. ''We made a deal, remember?'' he started, ''since you have therapy, you can't do whatever you want. I only want the best for you, you know that. I want you to get better, but you need to try too.'' I turned around at my dad and rolled my eyes, ''I __am__ trying.'' ''Well, you're not listening. I told you you had to be home at 8 pm,'' he said. Once again I rolled my eyes, ''do you have any idea how early that is? I'm not a little kid anymore!'' ''I know that you're not, but that doesn't-...'' ''Then stop treating my like one. Just because I'm 'sick', doesn't mean you get to treat me like a stupid little brat.'' ''Eli, please-...'' ''Whatever, dad,'' I said and ran upstairs, I walked to my room and locked the door behind me when I walked in. I let myself fall down on my bed and let out a sigh. 'Stupid Bullfrog,' I thought. I closed my eyes and not much later, I fell asleep._

_The next morning I woke up from my phone buzzing. I opened my eyes and took my phone. 5 missed calls from Clare and 1 text. I opened it:_

_''We need to talk. Meet me at the park tonight at 6.  
__- Clare''_

_''We need to talk?'' I said to myself. Such messages were never good. It worried me. 'We had such a great night last night, she couldn't possibly want to break up, could she? Maybe the necklace was too much...' I shook my head, I needed to calm down a bit. I walked downstairs, nobody was home. Good, because I wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone. I ate breakfast and then I went upstairs again. I didn't feel like doing anything, so I just turned my computer on and decided to write some things. When it was almost 6 pm, I headed to the park._

_''Clare!'' I ran towards my girlfriend when I saw her sitting on a bench. I took a seat next to her, ''what did you wanted to talk about?'' I looked at her with a worried look on my face, but she smiled to me which made me calm down a bit. ''Well, last night, your dad called me,'' she started. I let out a sigh and rolled my eyes. ''He's worried about you, Eli,'' she continued. ''Yeah, a bit too much,'' I said, ''there's no need to be. I am fine.'' Clare shook her head, ''Eli, you have therapy, you need to listen to your dad, you're sick-...'' ''Yeah, sick of you guys treating me like a little kid,'' I stood up and looked at Clare. ''Eli, please...'' Clare said, and also stood up. She looked at me, ''we're just worried about you.'' I shook my head, ''you guys are treating my like I'm crazy. I hate people who do that.'' I saw Clare's eyes getting watery, and I wanted to stop. But something blocked me, I couldn't stop. There was a silence until I broke it, ''...I hate you.'' Clare's eyes started to fill with tears, but she held them back, ''you don't, Eli, please don't say anything that you don't mean.'' I gulped, ''Oh, I __do__ mean it. I hate you!'' Clare kept getting more tears, and more tears... ''Please, stop-...'' ''I HATE YOU, CLARE!'' Her eyes became big and the tears starting to roll down her cheek. I didn't like what I did, no, I hated it! I couldn't manage to apologize. I just kept looking at her. Clare stepped back, and then she turned around. She ran away, and I just kept watching her. When she was away, I grabbed my head. ''What have I done...?'' I asked myself._

_I went back to my home and noticed that my dad was home. ''Great,'' I mumbled and rolled my eyes. I went inside and, as expected, my dad approached me. ''Did you talk with Clare?'' he asked, and looked at me. I bit my lower lip, ''yeah, I did.'' I actually had a hard time to keep myself from crying, but my dad didn't seem to notice. ''And?'' he asked. ''It went well,'' I responded, ''I apologize for my behaviour,'' I rolled my eyes and my dad kept quiet. He just nodded and then I went to my room. Again, I locked the door behind me and let me fall down on my bed. I grabbed my phone and considered to call or text Clare to apologize, but I still couldn't. I threw my phone on my nightstand and fell asleep, hours later._

_When I woke up the next morning, I immediately checked my phone. 1 message. I opened it and let out a sigh. It was from Adam:_

_''Hey man, are we still up for gaming competition next saturday?  
__- Adam''_

_I sighed. 'I have bigger problems than that, Adam' I thought and decided to call Jake. He answered the phone._

_''Eli, hello,'' I heard his voice on the other side.  
__''Jake,'' I gulped, ''...how is Clare?''_

_It was quiet on the other side for a bit._

_''I don't know man... __**she hasn't come home last night**__.''_


End file.
